Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Warning! X-rated content post

First off, a question.

When seeing that post title did you:

a) click tentatively, hand shielding your eyes, worried about what evil that Krazy Kristie might be exposing you to

-OR-

b) enter with zeal, eager to see The Nasties?

Leave a comment, I'd really like to know ;)


Anyways, I am the lucky daughter of a most excellent mom. A mom who stayed home with us, read to us, gave us plenty of hugs, taxied us around to hockey/ringette/gymnastics/girl guides/student council/baseball/volleyball/basketball.....you get the picture. But...well, she got me as a daughter, which certainly has its perks, but definitely keeps the woman on her toes ;)

Enter- Mother's Day. A few little presents for her, but I thought a handmade gift was also in order. Mom being of a practical sort, I thought, "perhaps something useful!"

I decided to knit her up a dishcloth. But not just any dishcloth ;)

The pattern is by Nadine, and is advertised as meant for "cleaning up after life's little messes." I hope it will serve Mom well!!

37 comments:

Natasha said...

LOVE THIS!!!

Teresa said...

That is too funny!

Denise said...

That is hilarious! Way to start my morning off with a good laugh! LOL

Marg said...

Too funny, that's the second time I've seen someone use this pattern, and I still get a laugh out of it.

Stephanie said...

Yeah, I totally entered with zeal :) I love knitted washcloths, my MIL makes me a couple every Christmas and they are one of my favourite gifts.

Charlotte said...

hahahahahahaaaaa! that is brilliant :-D

Shay said...

I almost tripped over my own feet and shoved a couple of little old ladies out of the way to get in here as fast as possible. I have no shame or boundaries at all .

I kind of figure something like this makes cleaner fun-er or at least less excruciating. I dont know if fun-er is an actual word - I suspect not.

Anyone who doesnt think this is hilarious needs a humour transplant..

Bree said...

Well, I actually saw the ..umm.. "offending" dishcloth before I saw the title & thought, "oh dear, I wonder what that's supposed to be?" Then I checked the title & was glad to see the warning, since it meant it was what I thought it was. And now I can't stop chuckling about it.

Lesly said...

ha ha ha that utterly made my day right there. Hilarious!

Victoria Paige @ Boutique Uniquely said...

That is so great! I honestly entered with inquisitive zeal. That is so funny.

Charity said...

I threw caution to the wind, and clicked right away to see what you were up to:) I have to say I got quite a laugh! Your mom must have a wonderful sense of humor.
And now I may have to go check that pattern out. I could think of a few people to gift these to.

Megan said...

LOL! The post title totally made me want to click. :)

Kelly O. said...

I thought,"how bad could it be?" so I clicked right away :0)

Little Blue Mouse said...

Kristie!!!! I am so disappointed with you, how could you show such a thing?


I entered with zeal and was hoping for a lot worse! ;0)

LynCC said...

Haha! That's hilarious. I clicked with zeal, figuring I'd see some cross-stitch patches or something. lolol

Sequana said...

Oh my gosh! I LOVE it! *L*

And I had absolutely no trouble clicking in at all.

I wish I'd gotten something useful like that for M's Day.

Leslie said...

that is hysterical!!! i saw that title and totally clicked on eager to see what it was!

Aurora said...

HA! Last year for Mother's Day I crocheted a penis for my mom...it was hilarious! I also corcheted a boob hat for my dad last year, too. Pretty cool...

Oh, and I totally clicked curiously when I saw "X-rated." I figured it would be something hilarious.

Lee said...

OMG! That is hysterical! But the fact that you made it for your Mom on Mother's Day? Makes it EVEN BETTER. : ) She must rock.

FWIW, I use the Google Reader "Next" button, so I didn't have a choice, this just popped up into my screen. But if I had a choice, I would have entered gladly, LOL.

Tawny said...

Oh My!

I admit, I was a curious and decided to eagerly click over when I saw this in my reader. ;)

Pink Stitches said...

I really wanted to see what you meant by X-Rated! I've been contemplating writing about some X-Rated stuff on my blog but didn't want to scare people off. I'm still kinda iffy about it. I just want some advice for the "bedroom department". Do you think I should write about it?? BTW, I love this! haha My mom would LOVE IT!!!

felicity said...

I'm like Lee - I had no choice in the matter. But that just means I didn't get to click on this post FIRST out of all the ones in my reader. Which I totally would have. Your mom must be hella cool to appreciate a penis dishcloth.

Amy said...

You are just plain crazy...your blog always makes me laugh.

Liz said...

The first thing I thought is that you must be making a version of Schnibbles Times Two's X-rated Quilt!

Elizabeth D. said...

Too funny! I clicked over, wondering what I would stumble on, really. That is hilarious!!! :)

Quiltin' Sandy said...

LOL Kristie!!! OK- I know it is really 2 eyes and a VERY long nose, right???? heheh
I can remember a crochet pattern for a "peter warmer" years ago, too.
I bet your mother got a laugh out of her gift, too! Sandy. :)

Deb said...

I must admit, I jumped into your blog right away and with great zeal!! And no, I'm not offended. I don't know if you read knitting blogs much, but knitters seem much less "up tight" and/or less offended by silly things, like a knitting a penis on a dishcloth. In fact, last night, I saw a blog discussing pattern for a "Willie Warmer"--I guess for men who spend time outdoors in winter. But it made me laugh and so I proceeded to look for a similar pattern in fabric, but couldn't find one. :( Due to arthritis, I can't knit any more, so my (grown) outdoorsy son will just have make do!!

Deb clutteredquilter.blogspot.com
PS: I hope my reply is not too racy!!

Katie B. said...

That is HILARIOUS! I admit--I saw the post title in my reader while I was at work today and waited until I got home to click. :) I was afraid of what my coworkers might walk in on!

Rissa @ Hazel and Honeysuckle said...

Bwahaha, love it!

I make sure no-one's looking over my shoulder and then click away..! :P It's craft related, it can't be *that* bad... riiiight?

Amy @ Increasingly Domestic said...

Oh my!

**Blushes**

Hollie said...

You made me laugh out loud! I almost snorted my Diet Coke through my nose. I love it!

**nicke... said...

that is awesome! it makes me want to learn how to knit, really bad! and i have to be honest... i didn't read the title of the post, i was just scrolling down looking at pictures and what the... is that a penis??? then i started from the top and read the whole post! i want to meet your mom! she sounds like an awesome lady!

*kate said...

I clicked eagerly ... it would be the BEST bachelorette present. Every new wife needs some dish cloths!

patricia clearly said...

i did neither. i viewed it in a reader and when i read the title my inner eyebrow lifted. when i saw it i laughed aloud. well done and too funny!

Susanne said...

Honesty is the best policy:

I was going through my reader and unsubscribe from blogs I feel like I have a harder time keeping up with--usually those where there's no real personal connection.

Anyway, I decided before I made my final decision I would scroll through, on last time to before making my cut. Then I saw the dick.

And I had to ask myself..."is that REALLY a knitted PENIS?? on a CRAFTING/SEWING/QUITING/KNITTING blog????? "Oh, why yes. That's a Big Dick towel for my MOM" Needless to say, I've kept you in my reader. Because knitting a dick for your mom pretty much makes you golden in my book! HAHAHAHA!!!

Emily said...

How did I miss this the first time around???HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!

Z. Azwer said...

This is all too funny! XD