I am having some trouble with balance lately.
I have been going through a bit of a selfish phase this past while. I am starting to see that this isn't working for me of my family. I guess I have spent the past 7 years giving my all to my family, my work. We had 3 kids in 3 years, moved across the country and back, bought a house, renovated it, bought a practice, renovated it. I was tired. I was needing something for ME. I found it in sewing, etc. It has made me happy. BUT...sometimes it also adds to the chaos in my life. I try to do too much, I am thinking about it when I am with my kids, when I should be playing with them and focusing on them. I am not as interested in my career. It is great to have a hobby that you enjoy, but it should probably enhance your life, not take it over. Really, sometimes I can just buy a baby gift at the Gap instead of whipping up a quilt, right?
I feel like I am losing some closeness with my kids. I think part of it is the age and stage- this year one started full time school in Grade 1, another started Kindergarten at a new school, the last started preschool. They are getting bigger, more independent....but I don't want them to become distant. I need to pull them closer now more than ever. Too often I am too tired from trying to do it all, and end up snapping at them. There has been too much t.v. time. I need to tune in, and not just for the big stuff.
I need to find a balance of me as a mom, a wife, a sister/daughter/friend, with my work and just as Kristie: none of the above. I need to just sit and read a book. I need to phone an old friend to catch up. I need to drink a cup of tea, while doing NOTHING ELSE. I need to get more fresh air. I need to give my dog a scratch behind the ears until his leg starts thumping. I need to get to sleep at 10 o'clock, regularly.
I am going to try and start that. Today. I'm off to put the kettle on.....